Falling inside myself

Slipping away

Drifting in the memories

What happened to me…


I remember the bitterness

My blood stained lips

Thrashing and lashing until I screamed out

No superhero was there to save me

God himself had dipped out


Falling deeper into my inner sea

Toxic black tides washed over me


Alone is all I thought of me




Drowning in my darkened waters

At times wanting the water to fill me

Dying, would it have been so bad?

Emptiness, abuse, trauma

Those were the only things I ever had




No one hears me now

It’s me against the waves

Tumbling to find my way out

In the mean time you beat me

Trying to get me to shove my pain down

Keep it in secrecy


In my moments alone

I hated you all

For all that was done to me

All that I couldn’t be

My inner ocean turned to flames

From which my internal devil came


No, I didn’t throw my fists

I battled with wits

Calculated, calm

Keep throwing your hits

When I’m left alone catching my breath

Those are the moments I know who I am


I am not the punching bag you use me as


The flames that flicker in my soul


Pull my hair

Throw me down the stairs

Do it

All it ever did was awaken me


Keep punching my spin

Make me paralyzed

Should have finished me off


I let the universe have it’s way with you

Karma will do as it always does

I see it’s found you now


I escaped

Ever since then I’ve always stayed awake









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